Design Idea

These points are mentioned solely for fun. It’s also some experience which web-designers experience in their day to day job.

Any familiarity of the below mentioned points to anyone/events/incidents is purely coincidental

1. During the initial meeting, tell the designer that you need all the functionalities of Facebook, with YouTube video features, should have gadgets like in Yahoo and as simple as Google. Of course your budget is limited and you need the quotation within 2 days.
2. When you receive the quotation, you write an email, saying that, your friend’s brother’s friend can do that for 1/3^rd the price freelance.
3. After your web-designer presents you mock designs, tell him that you like the first design but it’s not quite what you want and when he asks what would be your like, tell I don’t have any suggestions. When he’s done with the improved design ask him for another 10 changes and then after completion, brag him that all this is really crazy, the second design is good enough for you after all the mess he had made with the first.
4. Call your designer every 5 min and tell him that you could not see the changes you requested on the testing server. Even after repeated requests from your designer to refresh your cache, you call him and lose your temper that the designer is trying to fool you by saying it’s done.
5. You promised to give the content in electronic format the next day after the quotation approval date. You don’t talk about the content for another 45 days and then call the designer to ask if the site is done.
6. When the designer calls for the content, you tell your secretary to pick up the phone and tell him you are busy in a meeting. This continues till the designer gives up for 45 days, if he plans to call.
7. You tell you will provide hosting in the contract and when the site is done, you show a server which doesn’t have a Web Server application, Database and Application language. You continue to argue with the designer, that hosting means providing a computer (hardware only). It’s the headache of the designer to install and configure web server, database and application technology. You are paranoid about security.
8. You insist that there will be no remote/FTP access to update the content, if you ask for any, sometime later. Your office is 50 KM away from designer’s firm and even for a word change the designer needs to come to your place, take appointment with the IT Manager and then have his ID checked thoroughly, go through a security check and then update the content. Company Policies you see.
9. Call the designer that the site is NOT FUNCTIONING in Antarctica, where your boss is on a vacation. Ask the designer why the heck it is not working in Antarctica and remind him that you have paid a HUGE amount for the site and also remind him about your friend’s brother’s friend who’s still giving a 1/3^rd rate proposal.
10. Delay the payment by telling that your boss is on a vacation in Antarctica and he needs to sign the check to release the payment.